Signs Your Cat Owns You

At the store, you pick up the cat food and kitty litter before you pick out anything for yourself.

You buy a video tape of fish swimming in an aquarium to entertain your cat.

The Christmas cards you send out feature your cat sitting on Santa's lap.

Your cat signs the card.

You accept dates only with those who have a cat.

If so, you eventually double-date with the cats to see how they get along.

You climb out of bed over the headboard or footboard, so you won't disturb the sleeping cat.

You cook a special turkey for your cat on holidays.

You feed your cat tidbits from the table with your fork.

You give your cat presents and a stocking at Christmas.

You spend more for your cat at Christmas than you do for your spouse.

You have more than four opened but rejected cans of cat food in the refrigerator.

You have pictures of your cat in your wallet.

You bring them out when your friends share pictures of their children.

You kiss your cat on the lips?

You microwave your cat's food.

You prepare your cat's food from scratch.

You put off making the bed until the cat gets up.

You scoop out the litter box after each use.

You wait at the box with the scoop in your hand.

You select your friends based on how well your cats like them.

You sleep in the same position all night because it annoys your
cats when you move.

You think it's cute when your cat swings on the drapes or licks the butter.

You watch bad TV because the cat is sleeping on the remote.

Your cat "insists" on a fancy Sunday breakfast consisting of an
omelette made from eggs, milk, and salmon, halibut, or trout.

Your cat eats out of cut crystal stemware because you both
watched the same commercial on television.

Your cat sits at the table (or ON the table) when you eat.

Your cat sleeps on your head.

You like it your cat sleeping on your head.

When people call to talk to you on the phone, you insist that they
say a few words to your cat as well,

When someone new comes to your house, you introduce your cat,
by name, to them.

You introduce your visitor (s) by name to your cat.

You stand at the open door indefinitely in the freezing rain while your cat sniffs the door, deciding whether to go out or come in?

You would rather spend a night at home with your cat than go
out on a bad date?