Tonights topic is relationships. There are some things that have given me lot to think about in past years and even right at this very moment. Those issues are faithfulness and respect towards own and other peoples relationships as well as how people see marriage, engagement or dating.
I have experience in dating, engagement and how it feels to get cheated and lied to in a relationship. I also have experience on men trying to hit on me although they know I'm are not available.
I myself have high respect on marriage and commitment. I see myself as a very loyal and committed person who can only be with one person at the time. For me being in a relationship is same as respecting, loving and putting the other person before you. Lies, playing games or cheating are not things I could stand or tolerate.
People today seem to have different ideas about marriage or relationships. These seem to be replaceable if something more interesting comes along. It's the rush that takes over and people make misjudgments and wrong decision in the heat of the moment. Afterwards they regret it, but then it's often too late.
I hate it when people play games in a relationship. When you are with someone then be committed to him or her. If it does not work then TALK to the person and get professional help. If it still does not work, then it might be better to break up, call of the engagement or get divorced. If you are flirting and playing games with other people on the side then you are on a very thin ice.
Have you ever been lied to or cheated?
I have and I can tell you after that you never see the person the same way you did. You will never be able to trust him again. (or maybe after many many years, but it will take a lot of time). So basically after that the relationship you had is broken beyond repair. There will also be very strong negative feelings of hate, disgust and disbelief. So it will be very difficult to handle any things with person who is going through these feelings. If it's a case of a divorce and there are also kids involved then it's not looking very pretty. In a worse scenario the person who got cheated will get back to you. She/he might even try to poison those kids minds against you.
The question that remains is: Was it really worth it?
What's with those people who see that you are taken and still try to flirt and hit on you. To be honest I'm totally sick with that.
Especially men get often wrong ideas. This has happened to me more than once. When I'm my lovely self and talk to people and maybe even smile occasionally and what happens next is me hearing I love yous. Then it gets really awkward. I'm trying to be very polite and say that I'm not interested and that I'm actually seeing someone or as the case is now I'm engaged to someone. I can tell you this has not happened to me in some nightclub or anything like that but in everyday life and I have just been my casual self.
The next act in this "play" is, and this irritates me the most, "the cranky stage". After I tell the person, who told me he is interested, that I'm taken (and not interested in him in any level) the latter part I never say out laud I'm too nice. Then they get really upset and mad at me.
So as outcome from all of this I think it's better not to smile or keep the smiles minimum. Tell as little about you as possible and if you get the vibe from someone, then just avoid him. If you don't avoid him then you are in the middle of this awkward stuff that you never really asked for.
As an end note I can tell you that I'm happily engaged and in love with my fiancé. He is the most loving, kind and special man I have ever met. The cheating and lying that I wrote about happened in a previous relationship years ago.